Monday, August 31, 2009

The Tree

It was Noon. I hadn't seen him in a while, so we went outside to talk. It was like any other fall day in Ohio. Not much had changed in my old neighborhood... except that his couch was outside. They were probably putting it out for large pickup or something. I sat on the asphalt that divided our yards while he stretched lazily across the couch. We were just chatting, but we both knew that they would be coming soon. My house was empty- I knew that for sure. My little brother and his sister were on the edge of the woods playing with some branches. They knew that they would soon be running too. In the grass were two hand guns- a silver one and a plastic black one. The black one was empty but the silver one was ready to go. I looked up into the field and saw them. They were walking across the field towards us... fast. "They're here" I calmly told him. "Run". He immediately got up and jogged to the others. They soon disappeared into the woods. Now it was just me and my dog... and they were still coming fast. I picked up the silver gun, only wanting to intimidate. It was still noon.
Few words were exchanged when the three men arrived on my street. "Get out of here!" I said to them as defiantly a young girl could say to three grown men. The one in the middle just snickered. The one on the right suddenly darted around me and grabbed the black gun and shot at me. Oops. loaded.
Bullets flew around me but I knew I wouldn't get hurt. I held up the silver gun with both hands and I aimed best as I could. I was, after all, a very unexperienced shooter. I stood with my feet shoulder length apart. I squeezed the trigger, holding my ground. The two that had yet to reveal their weapons just ran into my house and began tearing it apart looking for something. Despite my poor aim I managed to hit the one with the black gun in the leg. It was enough to get him to stop shooting, and he began to head toward my front door, seeking refuge in my home.
I took the opportunity to race for the woods. I ran in my moccasins through the trails I still know well, with my ferocious and faithful Blanca on my heels. I could soon hear the men behind me. Like Pocahontas (heh) I raced for the meeting place. I was running fast. I soon caught up with the rest of the group. It was not long after Noon at this time. The trees were beginning to thicken now. They became taller and much older than the trees closer to the house. Soon it grew dark. We were getting closer.
Our pace grew less frantic as we neared the clearing. Safety was not far ahead. Suddenly, There it was... the great Baobab tree. Hard to ignore but easily missed by those not looking for it. Suspended between two 'realms' the tree was a well-kept secret. It had been placed long ago, hidden by the sky and the old, deep forest. The top of the tree was not visibile. Looking up above the ring we could only see the deep blue and purple sky dotted with bright stars. The bottom half of the tree, the roots, were long and thick. Each root was about 300 feet long and about as thick as a dinner plate. They hung like a willow tree. Keep in mind, this is not a normal tree. It was suspended in mid air. I know it is difficult to imagine that but bear with me.
Like parts of a rope each root was grouped with others. there were about seven ropes made up of 12-15 roots. They were not twisted together but flinging around wildly. The tree seemed aware of our presence and became more animated as if urging us to hurry. The others went before me. They approached the roots and the tree became calm. I didn't see what happened next. I was trying to find a root for myself... but soon they were all gone and once again I was left alone only with my trusty dog.
I jumped on a root and began swinging. But wait! Blanca! She can't climb this tree! I jumped off and picked up my best friend. I frantically racked my brain for ideas and then decided to settle her in my backpack. She poked her head and paws out of the top and gave me a look of determination. It would seem uncomfortable for a dog to be in a backpack, but there was no other way. She wanted me to know that she could handle it. I swung the bag onto my back and grabbed another root.
Terrier in tow, I climbed up about ten feet and the root began to swing. After a few swings I was high enough and the time was right to let go and jump into the unknown. I flung up into the center of the tree- Into the dark sky, into the stars, and into the other realm.
And then I woke up.


Puppies Dressed as Cats (hahaha)

A Few of My Favorite Directors...

1. Quentin Tarantino. He breaks rules. Why are there rules? what for? who says? Being a student of certain creative things, rules, techniques, things that dont seem so creative feel limiting, but by knowing these rules and techniques we will learn how to break them. how to develop our own styles and techniques. one of my favorite parts of pulp fiction:

And, of course, a clip from Inglorious Basterds, which I HIGHLY recommend... that is, if you are into strange, weird, FANTASTIC movies. The fun starts at around 1:30, after Tarantino gives an introduction.

Tarantino is a master of suspense. The dialogue is amazing! I will be honest though, some people (ahem, heather davis) wouldn't like this movie much. It is not very romantic, and between action shots (which are short) are long periods of dialogue. For many impatient, lazy Americans (not saying you are lazy heather, I am just saying, you wont like it...) it is just too much. Tarantino is definitley aware of this fact, but remains true to his style and really just does not give a crap- inspiration for creative types like myself.
Colonel Hans Landa, played by Christoph Waltz is pretty amazing. It is not easy to deliver such heavy dialogue in a way that keeps people interested. Brad Pitt and even B.J. Novak from the office aren't so bad either, but 'Hans Landa' is the best character of the whole movie- IMO. This movie will make you sad (um... but not really cry...)- It will make you laugh at the most random moments- It will confuse the mess out of you, make you nervous while Shoshanna Dreyfus as she is interrogated by the man who murdered her entire family.. oh and be prepared for subtitles. Tarantino isn't going to make it THAT easy for you! but most of all, it will make you think. If you are into that kinda thing (you know, thinking), go see this. If you would prefer a romantic comedy that will make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, go see The Time Traveler's Wife. No, I didn't see that, but I heard it was sappy. Not really into that kinda thing because, well, its been done. over and over again. (though I wont lie, I do have Gone With The Wind in my computer, just waiting for some time to watch it...)
Another wonderful thing about Tarantino? The Music. I mean seriously, where else are you going to hear David Bowie in a WWII movie? Its amazing how he can pull it all together. I love the western feel to a lot of his work too. Okay, a scene from Kill Bill- the first Tarantino movie

I really think I was like 12 when I saw this movie. I thought it was pretty amazing and really is, I think, what launched me into the movie loving business.
Oh gosh, I am so tired. I need to sleep, I have to wake up in like 5 hours. WHY AM I STILL UP? clearly I am insane. Oh well. Well there is the Movie Director of the week. Awesome.

On Pocahontas

Many people say that Aladdin is the best Disney movie. Others would say 'The Little Mermaid' or "Finding Nemo". Well I am here to tell you that they are wrong. VERY WRONG. I am here to tell you that Pocahontas, is in fact, the best Disney movie ever made. Well, Lion King comes very close, but we'll talk about that one later. Yes, it is true, Pocahontas is the best, and here is why.

1. The 'spirituality' shown in Pocahontas kind of makes sense.
Not like the Little Mermaid, where the only kind of spirituality is in the power of Triton and Ursula the Sea-Witch. And seriously? Mer-people? Talking fish?! WTF? Aladdin isn't much better. In ways it perpetuates the stereotypes of Islam and Shari'a, and also presents a negative view of middle-eastern culture (where they cut off your ear if they dont like your face, its barbaric, but hey, its home!) but also contradicts itself. I mean seriously, look at how Jasmine is dressed? The film is actually pretty insulting to the Muslim community.
The only weird thing about Pocahontas is the talking tree, which really isn't that far off. Kekata, the Shaman, is a decent representation of a Native American community's spiritual guide in pre-colonial times. Grandmother Willow, Pocahontas' Spiritual Guide, is a representation of the connection of nature and the Native-American culture. Aimed towards children, Disney uses the simplest form of spiritual illustration and representation possible so that kids could have some kind of understanding of the culture of the time.

2. John Smith
Um, yeah. TOTAL BABE. But I am not going to lie, I would list the disney men like this:
1. John Smith
2. Prince Eric
3. Aladdin
4. Beast (after becoming human)
5. Prince Phillip (Sleeping Beauty)

3. The Animals DONT talk.
Granted, they dont talk in Aladdin either, but I grew up with the notion that tigers are friendly animals that will give you a lift over your father's walls when you want to run away in the middle of the night. I also thought that throwing biscuits out your bedroom window in the middle of the night would attract friendly raccoons. They came, alright, but whether or not they were friendly, I dont know. They ran away when I went outside to catch them.

4. Pocahontas addresses many social issues
Yes, Aladdin does too, but lets face it. Aladdin was a criminal. He stole a bunch of stuff. He lied to people. What are we teaching our kids? that it is okay to lie when you have some magic lamp? Pocahontas never lied about who she was. She defended her culture from a pompous (albeit super hot) englishman. I have tried that before and I will have you know that it is not as easy as it seems, standing up to a condescending englishman... (with, um, an American accent).
Not only does she defend her culture, but she defends John Smith, who represents a country that is about to destroy her way of life. Although she knows things are going to change, she fights to save the english because she knows that a person is a person (no matter how small. hahaha, oh dr. seuss...)
Pocahontas is one of the few Disney princesses who I would consider a feminist. Um, let me just tell you though. WHY IS POCAHONTAS VER FEATURED WITH THE DISNEY PRINCESSES? um, wtf?! she is actually a princess. I mean Belle is always featured and she was NEVER a princess! She just got with some prince. That does NOT constitute princess status. GIVE POCAHONTAS PRINCESS STATUS!

5. Pocahontas is a minority.
um, where is the hispanic princess? where is the African princess? srsly, what is up with all the Europeans? We got Jasmine and Pocahontas. oh, and Mulan does NOT count. she is awesome, but not a princess.
And there you have it. just 5 of the many reasons that Pocahontas is an awesome disney movie.

and um, yeah, I am very aware that this is probably the most pointless posts I have ever written. I just had too much energy tonight, and nothing of consequence to say...

I'm Working On It...

I am, I am! I have just been so busy. my stupid '' url is so useless, so this december it will be gone and I will be switching to something that isn't totally lame. I was going to use that to be blogging about the beauty industry and whatnot (when I was at ULTA) but these days its not so important anymore. True, the way you wear (or dont wear) your makeup, hair, etc reflects something that is going on inside and there is a deeper side to the industry that many people are quick to call 'shallow', but right now it is not something I want to get into.
So what should I write about? Ideas? I need something other than 'myself' to talk about. I think I do it so much because it is easiest.. and see, there I go again, talking about myself. Jerel was right. I am so narcissistic.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

I need something to do tonight. Taco Bell?

so here I am sitting in my room. My hair is still wet from the random shower that I took this afternoon and I am in desperate need of some stimulation that does not involve a computer screen. Going to the movies is pretty much one of the very few things to do here in BS and I really don't feel like doing that. I want to run around in the woods, in the field, with good friends. I want to stay out late into the night until all that there is left to do is lay in the grass staring at the stars while sharing stupid but intimate childhood stories. I want to sit in the dark outside at Camp Mohaven with Marie, Tim, Matt, and Julia. But Marie is in Washington. I don't even remember Tim's last name. Matt probably wouldn't even remember me, and of course, Julia....
let me just NOT put myself in that place tonight.

So, what shall I do tonight? Who should I call? It is already 7:30. Maybe I should go shooting before the sun goes down? I probably should have thought of that sooner. The light will be gone soon...
but.. its not gone yet, and hey, there is still golden hour after all...

update on my life

For the last two years recording my life had been reduced to blog entries and photography. Not that that is bad or anything, but for some reason I didn't keep an actual journal. I had journals but maybe I was afraid of what I would write if I was certain that no one else would read it. Blogging was easier because there was always that chance- well i was almost always certain that someone was going to read it. My distress was thinly veiled... I wrote lots of random stuff but I remember well how I really felt at the time... so Imagine how upset I was when I accidentally deleted all of my posts. I lost my thoughts... the history of the last couple of years of my life. There are still the photographs though, which speak volumes. I can look at those and find different meanings for them each time. Things I didn't even know I was saying... but still, the words would have been nice to look back on.
But... maybe I was meant to accidentally delete those entries. Maybe I am not meant to look back?For some reason I have been thinking of the story of Lot's wife lately. I am not really sure what brought it up but now I think I understand. In Luke 17:32 to 33 Jesus says "Remember Lot’s Wife. If you cling to your life, you will lose it, if you let your life go, you will save it." If I were to dwell on the past- on what seemed like the lowest point of my life so far, what would happen to me? Would I get sucked into the old way of thinking again?
I dont want to over-do it now. I dont want to turn into a cliche. To sum it all up, God answers prayer. Even at my lowest and weakest point, somehow he heard me. I dont want to think about what would have happened to me if I hadn't clung to the little hope that I had.
Welllll that is enough for now. Happy Sabbath to you, faithful readers (uh, soogie and alia lol). This morning I am doing my best to stay under the radar. Yes, God has been infinitely good to me and yet I am still too lazy to get out of bed on Sabbath morning, get all dressed up, and go to church. I plan to go around 11:30. most of the stuff before that is all fluff- you know, that girl gets up and does earnest prayer number 4- you know the one, where she sounds so desperate as she says 'And Lord, you know our hearts!'. After earnest prayer number 4, that girl leads out in some inspirational praise music, which I would find inspirational if I didn't feel like I was watching some kind of play. Some parts of church are just not real to me. For some people, each desperate look to the PMC ceiling... every squeeze of the eyes is a carefully planned action.. all a part of the show.
Pastor Nelson, though? he is all real, and that is what I like the most about PMC. His sermons are not made to be these big, emotionally-based things that bring you to turn your life around instantly. They are seeds planted in our minds so that over time, they all grow together to form a sturdy vine that we can hold on to when times get rough.
So that is why instead of taking a shower right now I am going back to sleep.
what a random post, lol.

Friday, August 14, 2009

A Few of My Favorite Things

A few shots from Tanzania.

Learning Swahili
The Elephant

Saturday, August 8, 2009


soo it has taken a looong time but I finally got a new charger for my laptop (that works!).
Today I embark on this journey to the North. I am leaving Charleston in the next hour and making my way towards Berrien Springs. Tonight I am heading to an Emery concert with Courtney and then tomorrow I will be probably heading towards the Columbus/Mount Vernon area. No solid plans yet, I am sort of wingin' it. My Aunt is at a Pathfinder camporee all week so I wont be able to get into the house until Sunday- which is cool- I can handle floating around for a bit. So yeah... that is kind of the plan. Hopefully I will be able to find a job near school before all the freshman get on campus. Because of all this 'traveling' I probably wont be able to get this site up until some time next week- but I am definitely going to do it. Until then, let me link you all to my flickr, facebook, and twitter.

oh.. and VOTE for my brickfish entry! tell your friends!